Times Past
I passed my high school just the other day, and there was a moment where it felt like I had passed an old friend. That moment when you pass by, wondering if they recognize you from that 6th grade science class in which you sat and talked through the teacher’s talking. But you both pass each other and say nothing, you do nothing.
Things are so different now, and it’s come to the point where I can’t really take it all. How did we all end up like this? How did I end up defying my parents for him,when all we’ve had is hard times? I tell myself things will get better. They have to. How did my best friend end up with someone who hurts her more than he makes her happy, in the long run, someone who has taken her away from me? How are we old enough to be moving in with our boyfriends? How are we old enough to be knocking back drinks like we don’t really care? I feel like we’ve forgotten who we are, and ultimately, it will hurt us in the end.
A song comes up on my playlist, a song I haven’t heard since my freshman year, when we would sing it in the hallways. When she would get it stuck in my head, when I would forget the lyrics halfway through and we would just laugh. We were such good friends before life hit us like a semi-truck, leaving us both jaded and angry, sometimes with each other.
Some days, I wish I could go back. We could go back to high school, before we fought with our parents, before we had to go to college, before we fought with each other. Before we met boys and those boys ripped our friendship apart, popping one seam at a time.
Some days, I wish I had never grown up.
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